Friday, February 4, 2011

The Unwanted Me


I have grown up knowing that I was kinda different from the rest of my family but one thing was certain to me that I was and would always be loved. I may lived in fear that eventually I would have to reveal myself to them and that is a moment every person dreads.
It took me 24 years to at least come to terms with my sexuality, add to that one more year to gather enough courage to put myself to the world. Last November I came out to my cousin and that was one of the most tense moments in my life. Surprisingly I went better than I envisioned with him accepting me for who I am and pledging his life for me.
Today turned out to be the darkest and most trying in my life. I woke up to find a message from my only sister, the message went: " Found out you are gay, I don't want to even talk to you ever. You are an abomination before God and cursed to face all evil in the world. " You can't imagine the shock I was in, why did this have to happen to me? From what I gather someone on facebook ousted me for reasons best known to him.
After the initial shock faded, I wrote this to her - I'll talk to you once I'm able to digest all, it's in your discretion how to react to all. For now I ain't got more to say. Regards. - I then deactivated my facebook account and when offline on my mobile yahoo messenger, I didn't know anything else to do.
Long story short in just one day I have changed from a loving brother cared for and accepted into a hated abomination, shunned and cursed. WHY? You may ask, just for trying to be me - The Unwanted Me.

2 comments:

  1. My advise- Try and meet her in neutral place(restaurant maybe?) and talk to her. Understand that this is a shock to her and that she is the one who requires understanding- believe it or not but right now its all about how this news affects HER.

    Eventually she will understand that you are still the same brother and it does not really matter who you sleep with.

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  2. @Gaynairobiman, thanx for that, it does make sense but I'm thinking of giving her time to internalize the news first before I try to make her come to terms with who I am.
    I am also not ready to face her yet, her words still hurt.

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